Our Tug Florida needs some mechanical work and will be going to the shipyard. In other words, Butch's home away from home is experiencing some drama. (Boats and ships ARE female after all! Drama is ok here and there!)
In the days leading up to her
vacation imprisonment stay in the shipyard, some work has to be done prepping her up. While Butch usually gets quite dirty working on the deck, he's been helping out a lot in the engine room this week. To Butch this is a challenge and a change of pace. For me, it means Butch is destroying his clothes with grease, diesel fuel, oil, grime, dirt, and other such icky substances that I don't normally come in contact with. I can assure you he is happier than a pig in mud, because it seems that men, at least my kind of man, actually
enjoys getting nasty, sweaty, stinky and greasy. Me? Not so much.
Let me clarify this nastiness by saying that I think normal people have two distinct sets of clothes. They have winter clothes, and they have summer clothes. But in our tugboat world, Butch has five-count 'em-FIVE sets of clothes. He has normal summer clothes, and he has normal winter clothes. But let's not be boring and ordinary and stop there...OH NO!
He also has boat clothes. Let me specify that these stay on the boat or in a sealed Rubbermaid bin in our closet because they have boat funk. Boat funk is a term I use specifically for items Butch wears or uses at work. The boat funk is a unique
fragrance scent aroma stench that emits from such items and cannot be washed out. No amount of laundry soap, fabric softner, Oxy Clean or Gain Fireworks can remove that special stench. They are clean after I wash them, but they still have that funk. Now you understand why this blog post is entitled "Ewwwwww", because that is what I say as I duck and run for cover.
Therefore:
He has Summer boat clothes, which consists of cargo shorts, muscle shirts and thin t-shirts which can be any color except navy blue or black because he gets too hot in them. These attractive ensembles also require low cut socks but not footies, because he still has to work in heavy work boots with a 6" shaft. No flip flops or tennis shoes allowed! The accessories to complete this look include bandanas to mop up sweat and wear under his hard hat and his fragrance of choice is Avon's Bug Guard bug spray in the green aerosol can. (The silver can doesn't provide as much protection it seems. Or maybe the bugs here just like the taste. And the "pump" bottle is just too much work)
Then he has his Fall wardrobe, which consists of the same t shirts from Summer, along with a few darker colored ones just to mix it up. He keeps a couple pairs of cargo shorts, and adds a few pair of jeans. He keeps the short socks, to wear with cargo shorts, but adds in a few tall socks to wear with jeans. Butch
will not wear short socks with long pants. Nope. Not this guy. Accessories still include the attractive bandanas, work boots and bug spray.
Then comes the Winter Wardrobe. Although living in Coastal Georgia it stays pretty warm compared to the rest of the country, temperatures drop down in the low twenties and teens with a wind chill on top of that. Let me also mention that my man is a little popsicle and naturally cold natured. Therefore, Butch has Winter boat clothes, which consist of flannel lined jeans, flannel lined cargo pants, thermal underwear shirts, long sleeved t-shirts, thick tall socks, flannel long sleeve shirts, hoodies and the aforementioned work boots. He also has an extensive collection of skull caps, waterproof gloves and this contraption I found him that is like a band of Polar Fleece that Velcros around his head and keeps his ears warm. It's like a girl's stretchy headband, only not stretchy but Velcro-y instead and not girly at all. It fits more snugly under the hardhat than a skull cap. Bug spray is kept on hand but rarely needed.
When Spring arrives, Butch basically edges back into the Fall wardrobe, but by then the t-shirts have usually all been replaced with new ones that are not sun bleached and paint covered. And bust out another few fresh can of the bug spray.
Now for home wear, the man has the same sets of clothes: the Fall/Spring ensembles, the Winter line and the Summer Collection. Then he has his church clothes, which are suits, dress shirts, shiny dress shoes, undershirts, ties, pocket hankies....oh wait...maybe I shouldn't say "pocket hankies" on my blog. Some other rough and tough tug boat dude might find out. Oh well. Too late :) Besides, I am a sucker for a man with a pocket hanky! He also has separate work clothes for yard work.
WAIT A COTTON PICKIN' MINUTE HERE!!!!!
That's.....EIGHT sets of clothes! And only one set is them is kept on the boat at a time! No wonder I don't have any closet space! This is totally unfair.....
I'm going shopping! ;)
